


if gold rusts

by joyeuseful



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence - Avengers (2012), Ficlet, Gen, Genderfluid Loki (Marvel), Not Thor: The Dark World Compliant, Post Avengers, tiddies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:40:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23457172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joyeuseful/pseuds/joyeuseful
Summary: Gilded chains were nothing new to Loki. Except this time, he knew he was a prisoner.
Relationships: Loki & Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 43





	if gold rusts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [feriswheel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/feriswheel/gifts), [Nanimok](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanimok/gifts), [tiredcreecher](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiredcreecher/gifts), [Awsomeangel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Awsomeangel/gifts).



Loki touched the golden collar enshrouding his neck. Blood stained the edges where it had already begun to chafe his flesh. Small, golden chains hung from the bottom, each one binding an ability. Illusion, conjuration, enchantment, divination, and evocation were all locked away from him now. 

So be it. It was the price he would pay for his crimes, as decreed by the All-Father. Loki held no wish to argue with him this time. There was no winning with someone who deemed themselves infallible. 

His reflection smiled at him. Gilded chains were nothing new to Loki. Except this time, he knew he was a prisoner.

The door to his chambers opened, and Thor entered. He said nothing and in his hands was Loki’s horned helmet, held in a tight grip. 

Loki turned, the golden chains jingling with his movement. “Come to see your handiwork?”

Thor looked anywhere but at him. “I am not one to gloat.” 

Loki scoffed. “I cannot believe you have learned the error of your ways with a mere few days on Midgard. You have changed so completely, as if to become a new person.” He stood and approached Thor. “It seems like a gift of the All-Father to allow you such flexibility.”

Thor’s gaze was steady on Loki as he approached. The scars and barely healed wounds adorning Loki's body were bared for him to see, a lingering monument to Loki's time in captivity.“You can change too. We do not need to heed the course set for us.”

Loki took his helm from Thor and placed it on his head, the shape of it changing from enclosed to open, allowing for more freedom of movement. It was less protective and more ornamental. “Can one such as I truly change my nature? There is so much you can change about me, but I will always remain Loki. Your shadow.” He shifted into a feminine form. At least Odin could not lock away his innate shapeshifting abilities. 

“I wear a different form, yet any who see me would still know me as Loki. I cannot change as surely as the sun cannot refuse to rise.” 

Thor sighed. “You have little belief in yourself, but I know you. You are clever and wise. I would still have you by my side if I could trust you.”

Chuckling, Loki played with the golden chains. “You wish me to redefine my existence? Who should I be then? Where shall I go? If I am with you, I shall remain the betrayer Loki, and if I leave, I will be no one. Without Thor, there is no Loki. I do not know if I can bear losing what I am. It is all I have now.”

“You speak in lies and obfuscations. We have not stopped loving or caring for you despite what has happened.” Thor sat on the edge of Loki’s bed. “You have your family, you have our love, and one day, you may even earn back our trust.” 

Sitting next to Thor, Loki took his hand, placing it at the top of her left breast. “Do you feel that? In my chest lies the heartbeat of a liar and murderer. I have committed patricide, I invaded Midgard. I am not to be trusted. Shall I rule Jotunheim as a puppet of Asgard? I killed Laufey, my own flesh and blood. I am a kinslayer, and a regicide. There is no future for Loki, and I refuse to become someone else.” 

She took his hand and dug her nails into his palm, drawing blood. “I have found my final shape—anathema.”


End file.
